Click on the picture and it will take you to an Ellen interview. The link was floating about my FB page the other day. I had never heard of her before but Robyn Lawley wears a size 12. Yes, you read that right–12. She is a “PLUS SIZE” model. We can stop right here and talk about how utterly ridiculous that is. A 12 is the size of the AVERAGE woman in the United States. She is also 6′ 2″ tall and 24 years old. There is nothing in the English language that remotely translates all that into “PLUS SIZE.” So let me begin by declaring my bias–the fashion industry is ignorant and anti-woman. Any iota of human intelligence will tell you this type of labeling is irrational and is going to hurt ALL women (it is hurting boys/men now, too). It sets a standard that cannot be met with normal healthy living. So I believe that, with malice of forethought, this must have evolved deliberately. So it is W-A-Y past time for women (and girls) to take the reins back and return to sanity. (End of rant.)
What I was thinking about is what she said in the article. As a young model she was gullible enough to try the whole extreme dieting thing and was miserable. She gave up modeling and became a FOOD BLOGGER! What spunk. I love that. You can find her blog here. She then (at her normal size 12) went back into modeling as a plus size. (Head shaking.) In the interview she says, “I love my body.” Everyone clapped. They love it, too. (Joke!) Seriously, the audience was responding to the sentiment. I L O V E My Body. Then she gets really crazy and says she can stand in front of a mirror and say it. She loves her hips. YES, she said that–on national TV she said that–out loud, for all to hear. (I know, right?)
Can you say that? Can you get naked and stand in front of your mirror, in absolute privacy, and say that out loud. “I LOVE MY BODY.” Can you name 5 things (even 1 thing) about your body that you like? Without crying, cringing, blushing, or repenting for the lie? I dare you to go try it. Yeah, right now……….I’ll wait.
Okay, how did it go? Great I hope. Fact is, I can. I have struggled with my weight all my life. Normal for me is anywhere from 146 to 298 lbs; anorexia, bulimia, grazing, or binges; or from extreme exercising to none at all. NEVER did I l-o-v-e my body. Once when I was a size 10, my then brother-in-law expressed concern at my lack of eating. My mother told him to, “Shut up, she is finally “starting” to look n o r m a l.” I knew there was no hope. I immediately began putting the weight back on. I have been up and down several times since. When I was 15 my sister told me, “Mom would love you if you would just lose the weight.” I could go on. The fact is my body, at some point, became my worst enemy. “It” was the cause of all my problems. Then one day, I came to understand that my body was, in fact, the very definition of my life. We are walking down this path together. I can’t continue without it. If I love my life, then I love my body. There are good things and bad things about it (I sunburn too easily, I am very proportionate) and all together it is “me.” It is a beautiful thing. This is the body those who love me can’t wait to be hugged by. This hand is the one they want to hold. These are the eyes they can’t wait to gaze into. Here is the smile they are longing to see. My heart and soul are safely tucked away inside. THAT is what you are too, to all those who have, do, and will love you; and to those to whom you will extend the gift of kindness and caring.
The fact is that in this culture (and it is worse in others) even friends and family measure a girl/woman’s (boys/man’s) worth by her body size. Well, that is just disgusting. And, with the standard a size “0,” 99% of us are doomed to certain failure. (How utterly ridiculous, non-existent is the new “normal.” They wish we were non-existent is what they are saying.) So, how many of us think the rash of bizarre fashion (pasties in the mall? Seriously?), piercings, tattoos, plastic surgery, lumps, and scaring are a direct response to this certain failure? I DO! I DO!! ‘I can’t meet their ideal so I will make one of my own.’ To that I say, “YES!” but don’t just pretend it “for show.” Really do it.
Blow off all the nonsense in the press, TV, and movies. They are wrong. They are telling you airbrushed lies–and you know it!!! You don’t have to dress like a slut, overspend to compete with the red carpet, or engage in self-mutilation. (No I am not saying all piercings, tattoos, lumps, and plastic surgery are self-mutilation–but some of it is, and you know it.) Stand up. Be a woman. LOVE your body! Help your friends and family love theirs, too. What Robyn found is that once you love your body you will begin to take better care of it. You will naturally make good choices for one you love. You might find that you love your body more than you love (you name it–I would hate to trigger someone’s downfall) and will take the time to do something good for it. Her advice is to get to your natural healthy weight and stay there. Do not even take a moment to turn your mind to whatever the idiot talking heads are saying–to sell more of their junk to the gullible masses. Live in and love the only body you will ever have. Enjoy yourSELF!
Thanks, I needed that. I am going to do it! Everyday I am going to say “I love you,” to me. I do take vitamins and minerals, try to exercise, and try to sleep better, but the fact is I am currently a bunch overweight–again. I can’t tell you how disappointed I am. I am working on notes for another blog elsewhere chronicling my journey. Maybe you will find it and will cheer me on, but regardless, know that I am cheering you on. It will take us all to change this message. It has been out there since the advent of TV at least. Airbrushing has made it exponentially worse. It needs to stop. As I watch young women coming along behind me, I know it must stop. To see even one more beautiful young girl choose bulimia, anorexia, laxatives, or obesity because there is no hope for a size “0” is more than I can bear. It breaks my heart.
Full figured or slim, young or old, and plain or fair you are a one of a kind never to be repeated rare gem. You deserve to be treasured by yourself and others. If there are improvements to be made, love your self enough to polish that diamond–not hide it, destroy it, or leave it to rot.
You hold the birth certificate, you own it–it is becoming a classic.